So the other day I came across a quote that I just loved. I am not sure who wrote it but here it is:
With having 3 young sons (Jack 9, Beau 7, and Ethan 5), and a little girl (Allie 3) I hope this is the way that they look at me.
With our boys, and like most of the little boys out there, if you ask them who their Heros are, 9 times out of 10 they will probably say a super hero like Superman or Batman. Don’t worry Dads that is not only Ok, but normal at that age. Batman and Superman are cool. They have cool super powers and can stop buildings from falling over.
But as we grow older, we know the real heros are those that do not have fancy capes or gadgets. Heroes are the people that we look up to. They are the people that make a difference in our lives and the lives of those around them. I really, really try hard to be the kind of Dad that my Father was to me and my brother. He was there for us when we needed him. More important he was there to give us that reminder to be on our best behavior. That reminder was also always followed with a “call if you need us to come pick you or your friends up… no matter the time.”
They always wanted us to be safe and to make good sound judgements as best we could. They would do what ever they could to keep us safe and to keep our friends safe. Isn’t that what a hero is supposed to do?
A hero is also someone that has love and compassion for others. They love you enough to help you. Kids understand love by our actions, not just our words. Yes, love is felt in way we talk to them, but it is also felt in the way we hold them, the way we play with them, the way that we listen to them and even in the way that we set boundaries for them. They know it by every interaction that we have.
My mom was as great example of this. She was always there to keep me on a good and honest path. She thought me how to do things around the house: how to do laundry, cook, bake, and clean. (Becky comments about how much she appreciates that I was taught these things, too, since I do a lot of these things with her at home.)
I remember being a kids and doing these things with my mom, while we just talked. It must have rubbed off on me, because today I actually find these things to be relaxing and I like folding laundry and cooking. I didn’t think of them as painful chores, because I would taught how to do them in a loving way.
Yes, Dads… we are our Son’s first hero. We show them exactly what a hero should look like. Kind, strong, loving, forgiving, courageous…
Yes, Dads… we are a our daughter’s first love. We show her how a man treats a woman and what to look for in her future relationships. Theodore Hesburgh once said: “The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.”
Every day we can strive to do these things. We will fall along the way, but when we do, we show our kids that under that hero cape is a human being, doing his best. This will be the best lesson of all.
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I’d like my son’s to see me as w a hero but I don’t want to be on this unreachable pedestal. I’d like to be reachable and human. That’s an example I want to set for them and hope they will follow when they start their own families.
I agree. It is good to make mistakes and have them witness them. It is a great way to teach them that “Dad” makes mistakes too, and we all can learn from them. My Dad was awesome growing up and I wanted to flow the path. Now that it is my turn, I hope my kids will do the same.