Have you ever looked around at your life and thought: “I am failing as a parent!” If you have, that’s OK. To be honest, and I mean really honest, I think we have all been there at some point.
A father tries his best to build a bond with his two year old little girl. She cries, and only wants her “Mommy.” He knows why! He works a minimum of 60 hours during the work week and is now forced to spend part of his weekend at work, too. He feels that he is failing as a parent and is struggling to make that special connection. He wonders if that bond will ever grow or will it continue on the same path? He desperately wants her to be a “Daddy’s Girl,” but will she ever come around?
A young boy is seeking his independence, He wants to prove that he can do everything on his own and thinks he knows “everything!” He is a great kid and is extremely loving. He is very respectful with adults, his teachers, and his coaches. He is an excellent student, popular, and a good athlete. However, like all children, he wants to assert his independence at home – with his parents that he trusts and loves. It is a safe place to test your independence and your limits. Simple tasks go from asking for help, to him bargaining, to “Now your grounded for the way you are talking to your mother and I.” His parents seriously ask each other, “Are we failing as parents?
To every parent out there, these are true life situations! This was and is my life. My wife Becky and I want (and try) to be the best parents we can possibly be. We would do anything and everything for our kids. You know what, life is not picture perfect and it takes work. She was that new mother, struggling to breastfeed our first son, but she eventually picked up on it. She has done an awesome job as a mother. Looking back it was a huge struggle, but now we have 4 healthy beautiful kids.
It took some time and a lot of effort, but I am making that bond with my daughter. She is slowly coming around to become a “Daddy’s Girl.” Tonight was huge night for me. Becky usually does the bedtime routine with Allie. When she is all done and laying in bed, I make sure I go in and give her a big hug and a kiss before she goes to sleep. Tonight was different. Tonight she wanted her Daddy, too. Allie wanted me to tuck her in tonight🙂 You know what, it was the best part of my day!
The pre-teen years are tough! It is a work in progress, and there will be some ‘we need to talk about this new attitude’ moments with your child, but it is worth all the time needed. We navigate the rough patches, as often or as few as they may come. We are lucky that we have amazing children that are kind, generous-hearted and sincere. They make us proud to go by “Mom & Dad”. We have made sure that we are listening to them when they talk and in turn, they are listening to us when we talk. Parenting is a lot about give and take, when you get to the pre-teen years. You know what? It is one of my favorite ages, because they are FUN and they can hang out with us.
So when you feel like you are failing as a parent, we all go through it at some point! Keep your head up, take it on the chin (as they say) and remember they will learn more from you than anyone else. So don’t ever think they don’t need you, because they will ALWAYS need you!
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